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Archive for Toddlers – Page 3

Portrait of the artist as a young girl

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (7)·   April 11th, 2010

One of my favorite things to sit back and watch, recently, is the way Rebecca approaches drawing.  I am certainly not claiming she’s any kind of artistic prodigy.  But from a developmental standpoint, she is showing a lot more detail and precision.  When she first got the hang of crayons and markers, of course, it was your typical scribbled mass.  Finger paints, in particular, always ended up a big brown-ish blob.

My little artiste

Then she started to move from scribbling back and forth to a more circular motion.  Round and round and round she went.  She loved making circles.

My little artiste

Now, though, I’ve noticed that she has been drawing more small, separate shapes.  Even with finger paints, it’s  a dab here, a dab there, a line here, an arc there.  A strategically placed handprint.

My little artiste

She’s also started actually telling me what it is she’s drawing.  Sometimes, I think she makes a mark and then decides it looks like an oval or the number 7 or something.  But the other day, out at lunch, I saw her draw something intentionally for the first time.

My little artiste

She had made a small, loopy shape that started to look like a face. M picked up another crayon and made two marks for eyes.  Rebecca, then, made a round mark on either side of the circle for ears, and scribbled at the top for hair.  Narrating her intent as she was doing it.

My little artiste

I love watching this shift as it’s happening.  And, if I can be so bold as to make a prediction, I wonder if she is going to really gravitate towards learning to write when she starts school in September.  Being a Montessori program, of course, she’s free to choose her activities as she likes.  And I’m sure she’ll like the drawing and painting things.  But even now, she will sometimes tell me that she’s drawing letters and numbers, so I wonder if she’s going to seize the opportunity to figure out the real deal.  Time will tell…

My little artiste

Comments (7)
Categories : Child Development, Crafts, Toddlers
Tags : art, drawing, finger paint

Respect the Classics, Man

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (8)·   April 7th, 2010

I am proud to say that my children are developing delightfully eclectic taste in music. They certainly enjoy children’s music, of course.  We sing “Wheels on the Bus” pretty much every single night at bedtime, and they like their Music Together CDs.  Slightly more enjoyable to me (though maybe not the 45th time in a row) is the Barenaked Ladies’ album, Snacktime.  As I’ve mentioned before, Rebecca can sing along with about 75% of the album. It’s impressive.

On the list of odder favorites is a version of “I Am the Pirate King” from Pirates of Penzance.  I frigging love hearing a toddler singing “it is, it is a glorious thing to be the pirate king,” and she requests it OVER and OVER.  The newest addition is their first Beatles tune.  They’re positively nuts for “Yellow Submarine.”  As with anything they fixate on, they just want to hear it on repeat.

They love it so much that yesterday, I had to go get all stern with Daniel at naptime because he’d been shouting the song as loud as he could for nearly 25 minutes.

Tonight, they requested it at bedtime (they also sometimes request Queen’s “Bicycle Race,” don’t even ask…).  Apparently I did not start singing it in a timely enough fashion, because Daniel started belting it on his own.  Blessedly, the video camera was already upstairs and had just barely enough charge for me to capture it. The lighting stinks, but all parents know what a miracle it was that he didn’t immediately stop singing the moment I went to grab the camera.  So I’ll take it.

Enjoy.

Yellow Submarine from Goddess in Progress on Vimeo.

Comments (8)
Categories : Music, Toddlers, Video
Tags : singing

On and on and on

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (13)·   March 29th, 2010

I’m having one of those times when I feel like I work at an insane asylum for very small people. I’ve been trying to write a post about it for three days, but can’t manage it. And, so, I present three video clips that remind me of my life right now, and why my darling boy is driving me up a fricking wall.

1. He has switched from calling me Mommy to calling me Mama. Turns out this is actually the more annoying version. Especially when you say it once every 15 seconds. “Mama! Mama? Hey, Mama?”

2. He never, ever stops talking. This is largely very cute, and his memory for detail is alarmingly good. But he has to tell you EVERY detail. And he’s 2.5, so sometimes it takes about 5 minutes to get a full sentence out.

3. We haven’t hit the “why” phase yet (and, believe me, I am grateful), but he is constantly asking questions. Weirdly obvious ones, sometimes, as though asking questions is a new way to tell a story. “Mama, where are we going?” “Where are we going after the gym?” “What are we going to do after we leave the post office?” “Mama, where are those guys going?” “Mama, what is that lady doing?” “Mama, are you peeing?” “Mama, do you have a placemat?” “Mama, are you eating dinner?”

Again, like many (most?) things this age, it is simultaneously adorable and enough to make you rip your hair out.

(This video is hilarious in its entirety, but skip to 7min for the bit I’m thinking of. Language is not really suitable for work, or for little pitchers with big ears.)

Comments (13)
Categories : Behavior, Toddlers

When you dream

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (8)·   March 25th, 2010

I always wondered how young babies are when they start to dream. Do they always, from day one? Is it later, when they start to become more aware? Who knows.

I have long suspected Rebecca is a vivid dreamer. She’s a restless sleeper, and it’s not uncommon for her to wake in the middle of the night, seemingly distraught and in need of a pat on the back. But she’s usually still sleepy enough that she doesn’t say much about what’s bothering her and goes right back to sleep.

Daniel, on the other hand, sleeps like the dead. Sometimes, when I go in to check on them before I go to bed, I have to poke him so he’ll move enough for me to know he’s still breathing.

He woke up crying late last night, very uncharacteristic. I went in to check on him.

“Mommy, I’m so sad! I’m weawwy weawwy sad!”

“Oh, buddy, why are you sad?”

“I’m so sad, because they took all the phones!”

A hug and some vague reassurance about the phones, and back to sleep he went. As did I, with no more doubt about whether toddlers dream.

Comments (8)
Categories : Sleep, Toddlers
Tags : dreams, imagination, nightmares

The Myths of the SAHM, Part 1

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (14)·   March 23rd, 2010

I was thinking recently about the ways in which the reality of being a full-time stay-at-home-mom is different from what I imagined it might be.  And maybe different from how working moms imagine it might be.

One of the myths that struck me this week has to do with the idea of time and flexibility.  When I was pregnant and trying desperately to get the first OB appointment of the day so I wouldn’t have to miss too much work, I thought about how easy and convenient it would be if I wasn’t working and could just take that 10:45am or 2:30pm appointment.

Ha.

Yes, it’s true. I can go places during normal working hours.  And believe me, Target during the day on a Tuesday is a whole different world from mid-day Saturday.  And that’s cool.

But.

Anywhere I go, I go with the kids.  Post office? Hardware store? Supermarket? All with two kids in tow, who may or may not feel like doing good listening that day.  That mid-morning doctor’s appointment? Boy, there’s nothing quite like bringing the stroller to the dentist’s office or, better yet, the OB/GYN’s office. And let’s not forget that, while you don’t have to have the earliest appointment so you can get to work on time, you do have to work around the kids‘ schedule. No chance in hell will I schedule anything from about noon to 3PM, and forget about it when the kids were still taking two naps…

Today, it was physical therapy for some pain in my leg (so I can get back to running!).  He could see me at 9AM. My husband has a meeting on Tuesday mornings and couldn’t go into the office late.  We have no family in the area to call and come over for half an hour. Other at-home-mom friends were busy.  So I packed an extra bag with our trusty DVD player and headphones, and hauled it all in for my appointment.

PT

I was lucky, today was a good day. The show held their interest and they didn’t go wandering off to touch every breakable thing in sight while I was getting deep tissue work on my calf. They didn’t insist on sitting on my lap the whole time, nor did they wail and throw a tantrum about not wanting to be there. It was a short visit. Will it go as smoothly when we go back on Thursday? Maybe. Maybe not.

So, yeah, there are great and fun and flexible things about not going to an office for work every day.  But today, I thought, “at least if I was working, I’d already have childcare.”  Do I think working moms have it easy? Of course not.  But for those who are slogging away at the office and dreaming about how much easier life would be if you just stayed home with the kids all day?  Yeah, the grass ain’t much greener over here sometimes.

Comments (14)
Categories : SAHM, Toddlers
Tags : appointments, at-home-mom, time

BFFs

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (7)·   March 17th, 2010

Today was one of those glorious “OMG, winter might not actually last forever” kind of days.  After days of pouring rain that left nearly every basement in Massachusetts flooded, today was perfection.  Temps in the 60s and bright sunshine, hardly a cloud in the sky.  We were thrilled to make a triumphant return to one of our favorite playgrounds.

Return to the playground

It was a playdate with the usual suspects, our core group of twin-mom friends.  Six moms, 15 kids, no biggie.  The playground is reasonably friendly to the littler ones, and who can complain when you’re wearing sunglasses and no jacket? But one of my favorite parts of the afternoon was the pairing of Becca and her buddy, A.

Return to the playground

I first met Miss A when she was about eight weeks old. Her mom was my “big sister” through our twin club. She had two newborns, I was still enormously pregnant.  After my kids arrived, we took the double strollers out for walks, had “playdates” at each other’s houses, and have generally become good friends.  So it’s safe to say that my kids have known A (and her brother, D) their entire lives.

I remember how tickled I was when I realized the kids knew each other’s names.  Now? They tell stories about each other when they’re not around, they ask to go visit, and today, they spontaneously held hands at the playground.  They were beyond cute, holding hands up and down the play structure, down the slide. You could hear their little voices, negotiating the play. “Wet’s go over ‘dere! You go ‘dis way, I go ‘dat way. OK!”

Return to the playground

I loved seeing the changes in the way they interact, now that they’re older (A is 4 months older, please ignore the fact that she’s crazy-tall and my daughter is a midget).  I love how spontaneous it was. Neither mom suggested one play with the other, much less that they should hold hands all over the playground.  I love how very “girl” it was, again in such a spontaneous way.

Return to the playground

Oh, Spring. Welcome, my friend. We were waiting for you.

Comments (7)
Categories : Child Development, Preschoolers, Toddlers
Tags : friends, playground, playing together, Social/emotional development

The Most Magical Place on Earth

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (15)·   March 15th, 2010

Admittedly, I was already a Disney World fan before we took this trip. But doing Disney with two 2.5-year-olds? A BLAST.

They were primed, of course. They had gotten hooked on Mickey Mouse Clubhouse when my dad brought them a DVD of it at Thanksgiving, so they know and have developed an attachment to the main core of characters. They’ve seen a few of the movies (some Pixar, plus a recent screening of Peter Pan), and M has been reading Winnie the Pooh (the original) to them at night.  They were all kinds of excited to go see “Mickey’s castle.”

Disney World 2010

It did not disappoint.  Despite a 4:30am wake up call for our flight to Orlando, they were buzzing with excitement.  Even the bus from the airport had them absolutely ecstatic.

Disney World 2010

The Daisy & Donald Duck figures on the way to our room put them straight over the edge.

Disney World 2010

The next morning, we hit the Magic Kingdom and made a beeline for Fantasyland.  The Peter Pan ride was the first, and freaked Rebecca out, but she eventually got over it and asked to go again.  The carousel never had a wait. The Winnie the Pooh ride was an obsession (every 10 minutes: “I wanna bounce with Tigger!”).  Dumbo was a hit, regardless of the fact they’ve never seen the movie. It’s a Small World.  All of them, right there.  We parked the stroller outside of one ride and just popped over to the rest.

Disney World 2010

Disney World 2010

There’s even a train that circles the park, complete with a costumed conductor. What else could you possibly want?  We made brief trips into Animal Kingdom and Epcot, but Magic Kingdom is definitely where it’s at with this age.

Disney World 2010

I wasn’t sure how they’d react to the costumed characters. They’re rather large, after all, and plenty of kids have been known to freak out.  But mine loved them. ESPECIALLY Rebecca.  The girl nearly tackled Winnie the Pooh and Eeyore.

Disney World 2010 - Loving the characters

Someone suggested I make a reservation for a Character Breakfast, and it was totally worth the high price and mediocre buffet to see this look on Rebecca’s face:

Disney World 2010

She was so excited every time a new character approached the table, I’m impressed she managed to stay in her seat.  Daniel was not as over-the-moon as his sister, but did enjoy talking with Mickey and Goofy about what he was having for breakfast, and offering them bites of oatmeal and waffle. They politely declined.

Disney World 2010

Disney World 2010

Disney World 2010

It wasn’t a very long trip, really only three full days. There was a ton of stuff we didn’t do, either because the kids were too small or there just wasn’t enough time. But I’m really, really glad we went. The kids were absolutely enthralled, and they still get excited talking about what they did and who they saw. Can’t wait for the next time.

For anyone wanting tips on Disney World with the under-3 set, here’s the advice I came away with…

THINGS WE DID RIGHT

  • Brought the double umbrella stroller (our Maclaren). Folds up much better than the BOB, but still pushes nicely. Baskets were useful, kids did a fair amount of riding. And beats the crap out of the $30+/day to rent a plastic one at the park.
  • Stayed on Disney property. I know people say you can save money if you stay outside the park. But I think staying in a Disney hotel is totally worth it for the convenience. You get the FREE bus shuttle from the airport (which includes THEM picking up your bags at baggage claim and delivering them TO YOUR ROOM). The park buses take you wherever you need to go, and while sometimes you wish they were faster, I still think it beats the hell out of renting a car.
  • Got two connecting rooms. A bit of an indulgence, perhaps. But it meant we didn’t have to sit silently in the room while the kids were napping. Plus, M snores like a chainsaw, best not to wake the kids up.
  • Respected the schedule, sorta.  We left the parks around lunchtime every day and took the kids back to the hotel for a nap.  OK, so it often ended up being closer to 2:00 instead of our usual 12:30. But they got a nice, long nap each day. Not only did they desperately need it after all of the running around and over-stimulation, but it also meant we left the parks at the very busiest time of day.  Bedtime also ran a bit later than normal, but not too bad.
  • Get to the parks EARLY. It only gets more crowded as the day progresses. If you can get there right as it opens, you’ll be able to walk right onto two or three rides before you hit your first line. We never even bothered with a FastPass.
  • Respect that you’re there for the kids. If they want to go on the same ride 5 times in a row, just frigging do it. If you get caught up in the fact that YOU want to go on this or that ride, you’ll end up dragging them around and everyone will get cranky. Push them a little to try new things, but pay attention to what freaks them out and what they enjoy, and you’ll have a much better experience.

THINGS I’D DO DIFFERENTLY

  • Hotel upgrade. Normally I’m of the persuasion that you don’t go to Disney World to sit around in your room, so the low-end resorts are just peachy. And they are. Perfectly comfortable, kid-friendly, etc.  The flaw in my logic is that, with kids who nap and go to bed (somewhat) early, you actually do spend some time sitting around the hotel. We were at the All-Star Movies, and the down-side is that the low rates tend to attract large travel groups (there were several teenaged dance teams and at least one high school marching band) and an otherwise… interesting clientele. Without quite as many perks and amenities as some of the other resorts. This might have been the time to spend the extra little bit of cash and go up a level. I mean, really, we didn’t go into this one as a bargain vacation. Who are we kidding?
  • Plan meals ahead of time. That’s one area where my planning really fell down. I didn’t scope out restaurants enough, or make hardly any reservations ahead of time. So we ended up kind of scrambling/winging it for each meal. And at 7:15 on a Saturday night, you ain’t getting in anywhere. Enjoy the lukewarm quesadilla from the quick-service vendor while you attempt to find a place on the sidewalk to sit. I think I hesitated because I didn’t feel like I knew where we’d be in the parks for each meal. But even making a call earlier in the day for dinner that night will yield better results.
  • Bring more snacks from home. While I don’t advocate doing what some friends of ours once did (an ENTIRE suitcase full of food), I can say that reasonably healthy and toddler-friendly snacks are not super easy to come by. A few more boxes of raisins, bags of goldfish, and juice boxes would have been smart. You can even request a mini-fridge in your room if you want to bring something perishable.

TIPS AND TRICKS

  • Kids under 3 do not have to pay to enter the parks. They will not charge you for kids under 3 when you eat at a buffet, and if you want to have them eat off your plate at a table-service restaurant, you are welcome to do so. So if you’re debating whether to take the kids now (at 2.5) or wait until they’re 4? There’s a reason to go now.  (Not that they ask for proof of age…)
  • Taking the shuttles from hotel to park and back eats up a LOT of time.  Think a minimum of 30 minutes from when you get to the bus stop to when you arrive at your destination. Often more like 45-60.  You really have to think ahead on that one. That was a big factor in our consistently late naps and bedtimes. You just can’t get anywhere all that fast. Plan accordingly and accept it.
  • Cast Members (Disney employees) are your friends. Be kind to them, they work hard. And most of them are super sweet, and often have a little stash of goodies to give to kids who look like they need a treat. A man at the Peter Pan ride handed us stickers, the cashier at the All-Star food court gave us beaded necklaces, and a bus driver gave Daniel a pirate scarf and Rebecca a little green ring.  Yes, it’s their job to be nice to you, but return the favor.
  • There are designated meeting places for different characters, but the lines can be outrageous. Especially in the Magic Kingdom. But there was no waiting to see Pooh and his crew at Animal Kingdom, and the big names come right to your table for the Character Breakfast. Beats wasting half an hour in line to get a picture with Pluto.

Edited to add responses to questions asked in the comments!

I thought I read somewhere that grandparents were involved? What would you recommend the kid-to-adult ratio be?
My in-laws did come with us, and it proved very handy to have the extra adults. Especially when it allowed M to get up at the crack of dawn to come with me to my race, and we didn’t have to drag the kids. That said… I think it depends on the adults. My in-laws are nice people, but they often move entirely too slowly for my taste, especially when everything at Disney takes a while. So sometimes I felt they slowed us down. And with both me and M there, we were easily able to split the kids up if they wanted to do different things. So, evaluate your kids and your available adults. More people can be great, but it can also be more to coordinate.
What about potty, how did they handle it over there?
My uber-potty-master Rebecca did spectacularly. Used the bathrooms with no trouble (we always had our travel potty with us, so we just put it right on the seat). The industrial toilets were a little loud and scared her a teeny bit, but nothing too traumatic. I insisted on mid-morning potty breaks whether she asked to go or not, and she managed to have only a single accident our entire trip. Daniel had already gone back into Pull-Ups full-time before the trip, so we left it as-is. I would not have wanted to do it with an unreliably potty-trained kid, to be honest.
What did you do for the sleeping arrangements? Did they provide two cribs for you?
Yep, we requested two Pack & Plays when I made the reservation. They weren’t in our rooms when we checked in, so I had to make an extra call. But once I did, they were delivered promptly. I’m glad I brought PnP sheets from home, as the ones they provided were a little threadbare.
Comments (15)
Categories : Preschoolers, Toddlers, Travel
Tags : disney world, kids under 3, tips

Scrooge McDuck and the Karaoke Queen

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (4)·   March 2nd, 2010

If I was picking nicknames based on their current quirks, these are the ones I’d choose.

Daniel is obsessed with coins right now. Doesn’t much matter if they’re pennies or quarters, he simply must have at least two in his possession at all times.  He holds them, he balances them on his fingers or his knees, he sticks them in between the tines of a fork (or the crack in the windowsill, or the floor heating grate, etc.).  I think, if given the choice, he would swim in a pool of coins like Scrooge McDuck.

Children's Museum in February

The down-side, of course, is that he puts them down, drops them, or otherwise loses/misplaces them.  So, roughly 900 times per day, I hear “Mama, where’s my co-oines?” “Mama, I need more co-oines!”  I fricking HATE coins right now.  It’s all he talks about. He throws them, he plays with them instead of eating his meals. Yes, I take them away at times like that. But oy, it’s constant.  I’d find it a lot cuter if he wasn’t asking me to find them every six minutes.

[As a random aside, both kids have started calling me "Mama" in the last few weeks, and are sometimes calling M "dad."  We've been "mommy" and "daddy" since they started talking. I have no idea where this came from.]

Playground in March

Otherwise, though, I feel like Daniel’s behavior is moderating a little bit. Or, maybe my reaction to it is changing? A huge thanks to all of you for your input on the potty situation.  We had a successful weekend in underwear for him, and then a disastrous Monday morning. During which, I made my peace with putting him back in Pull-Ups. Clearly, now is just not the time for him, and I’m doing my best to back off.  And I think we’re both less stressed for it.

Children's Museum in February

Rebecca, for her own little quirk, feels compelled to sing along with everything. EVERYTHING.  TV theme songs, bedtime songs, songs on CD in the car.  This is not a brand new behavior. She’s long shown a love for singing. But it has definitely ramped up, and I’ve noticed an interesting twist.  While it’s not unusual for a two-year-old to want to hear the same thing over and over again, Rebecca seems to be doing it with a clear purpose: she’s trying to memorize it.  She will request the same song several times in a row, and attempt to sing more of it each time.  She can now sing most of the first half of the Barenaked Ladies’ Snacktime album.  Particular favorites are Polliwog in a Bog (“I want the froggie song!”) and Popcorn, but she really loves to sing the entire album. As a big BNL fan, I’m so proud…

Playground in March

The funniest part of this, for me, is that it is exactly something that I used to do.  As a kid and a teenager, I would listen to the same song over and over and over again. I’d mentally memorize every little tone.  I’d pause and rewind and write down the lyrics or try to transpose the chords with my barely passable guitar skills.  Who knew I had managed to pass along that kind of obsession to my daughter at such a young age.  Of course, my mom talks about listening to her Joni Mitchell record over and over again, so maybe it’s just straight genetics.

Comments (4)
Categories : Behavior, Toddlers
Tags : fixation, obsession, personality, quirks

2.5 + potty training = OMFG

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (16)·   February 27th, 2010

Right. So. Remember when I said my kids were potty trained? Well…

Rebecca is doing great. A superstar. I can think of only one accident in the last week. She can hold it, she tells me when she needs to go, she isn’t freaking out about poop the way some kids do, and she is perfectly willing to use the travel potty when we’re out and about. No problemo.

And then, there’s Daniel.  Oh, Daniel.

Sigh.

If you follow me on Twitter, you’ll know we’ve had a very, very difficult week.  Daniel has gotten hit HARD by the terrible-two-and-a-halfs.  Much like when he went through this phase back in October, he feels the need to be contrary AT ALL TIMES.  He pitches a fit that he doesn’t want breakfast.  Then he pitches a fit that he wants oatmeal. And raisins. NO RAISINS! I WANT RAISINS! NOT ON THAT SIDE OF THE PLACEMAT!  And this is all before 8:30am.  It goes on all day long.  If I ask him something or offer him something, he has to say no. I go to put it away, and he demands whatever he just declined. He claims to not want to play outside, not want to go to a friend’s house, not want to go to Starbucks. Riiight.  Sure ya don’t, buddy.

Worst of all, this has spilled over into potty training.  He did so well the first week.  Not perfect, but really well. He’d have a tiny accident (like small enough that a change of undies was not really necessary), stop himself, ask to use the potty, and finish. Brilliant.  No longer.

For one thing, he seems to have tuned out from listening to his body.  Now he has a full-on accident, and THEN tells me he needs to use the potty. When we’re at home, when we’re out. All over the damn place.  And, of course, if I ask him if he needs to go or ask him to sit and try before we leave the house… well, you can guess what the response is. “I don’t wanna! I don’t need to use the potty!”  Five minutes later… new pants. Again.  And did I mention he’s a notorious incomplete-emptier? The kid goes about a tablespoon at a time. Ugh.

The kicker is that sometimes he does well. Sometimes he asks to use the potty before he goes in his pants. Sometimes he poops in the potty.  He is very capable.  But much of the day, he tunes out and/or refuses all suggestion.  And those who have been through this will understand how it simply brought me to tears on Thursday night. Exhausted. Defeated. Broken. Sobbing.

So, friends, where do we go from here on the potty front?  Re-boot-camp?  New incentives? Back off and put on Pull-Ups for my own sanity?  As a general rule, I want to be as consistent as possible and don’t like going “backwards.” But I would also like to not end up in the looney bin.

And as for the behavior – pick my battles and ride it out? Be extra strict and nip the attitude in the bud? Start drinking heavily?

Comments (16)
Categories : Behavior, Child Development, Toddlers
Tags : control, defiance, potty training

To your corners

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (15)·   February 22nd, 2010

2010 is shaping up to be a year of big changes for my kids.  As it is, we’re knee-deep (sometimes almost literally, oy) in potty training.  In September, they start preschool.  We’re considering the switch out of cribs for sometime in the early summer (somebody hold me). I’m trying to think ahead and space these things out so they aren’t all hitting at the same time.

But, now, we’re thinking about adding one more to the list: separate bedrooms.

I’ve long been one to insist on keeping my kids together.  We’ve had occasional periods where one kid will disrupt the other’s sleep, and there were always people quick to suggest that we separate them, at least for naps. For whatever reason, I always was adamant about keeping them together, and the disruptions always passed.

But there’s something about 2.5 that has me reconsidering my stance.  It’s not the sleep. Sleep is just fine, and I don’t think separating them would make it significantly better or worse.  No, it’s more of a personal space issue.

My kids are in each others’ faces all day, every day. It’s just the reality of young twins. We go to the same activities. We eat meals together, we play together, they go down for naps together.  A lot of times, they play together, and it’s great.  But obviously they also fight and argue.  And have very few things that are their own, and very little ability to take some space if they want it. 2-and-a-half is hitting us, hard.

I like the idea of giving them each their own room as a way to have space to themselves if they need a break.  As it is, the bedroom that they share is a space used only for sleeping.  They don’t play upstairs very much at all, just a bit of running around while we get ready in the morning.  What if they each had their own room, with a few toys and books and cozy places? It’s not a gender-related thing for me, but more of a personality one. I think my kids are close to one another, but not as much as some twins I know, who would not want to be apart from one another.

This is also a little bit of hopeful self-preservation as I get ready for them to be out of cribs. My big fear is that the end of cribs will mean the end of naps, and that fear is only magnified if they are still sharing a room at that point.

But even more than being motivated out of fear, this is really about having something of their own.  A concept that is not totally familiar to them. Oh, sure, they have their own clothes and their own blankets. And one or two toys that are designated as belonging to one versus the other.  But nearly everything they have and everything they do is shared.

Just for kicks, I decided to ask them what they thought about sleeping in different rooms. I talked about how their beds are in the same room right now, and what would they think if their beds were in two different rooms? Would that be a good thing, or did they like having their beds together?  I honestly had no idea if they’d even understand the question.

Their answer? A hearty double-endorsement for “own rooms!”  Daniel was quite clear that his bed would go in the “changing room” (the second small bedroom that currently houses their dressers, a loveseat, and the now-defunct changing table).  Even when pressed, “are you sure you don’t want your beds together?”, they stuck to the “own rooms” vote.  And while I know this may or may not have any relation to their actual reaction to the transition, it was nonetheless interesting.

In the meantime, I will shop for cute wall decorations on Etsy and make my shopping list for IKEA.  This time around, I’m actually going to decorate these rooms, believe it or not!

So, dear friends, what do you think? Have you or will you separate your preschool-aged twins into separate rooms? Why or why not?  Do you think they really need the space, or am I totally projecting?

Comments (15)
Categories : Home, Toddlers
Tags : separating twins, sharing bedrooms
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