Finding the rhythm
This is my third solo week with the twins, after having quite an onslaught of visitors last week. For as much as being alone makes me really appreciate it when I have extra hands, the converse is also true. Having a (very) full house for eight days has also made me realize that I actually sort of enjoy being on my own with the babies. It’s hectic and stressful at times, but it’s nice to only have to worry about the three of us, and not wonder when other people are coming by or what they’ll want to do.
I’ve also gotten pretty darn good at getting us all out of the house when we want to. To do it well, though, takes some advance planning. If we’re going somewhere, the ideal time to leave is immediately after both of them have eaten. But that means by the time they start eating, I need to have already decided what we’re going to do and prepped/packed for it. There is very seldom a spontaneous trip outside of the house. But I do generally manage at least one excursion per day, whether it’s a walk around the neighborhood or an organized event.
For instance, I started a developmental class/group at a local maternity center yesterday. It was a blast, and I’m really glad I’m doing it and looking forward to next week. But the class starts at 9:30am, so I knew I should leave the house by 8:45. There was no earthly way I’d shower in the morning, so I had to shower and pack my diaper bag (change of clothes, blankets, burp cloths, diapers, food, etc.) the night before. Then, after they ate at about 6:30am, I could begin final preparations. Get everyone (including me) dressed, diaper bag and stroller in the car, drive a few towns away, extract all of us and our stuff from the car to the center, get settled… it’s a production. Several of the moms expressed astonishment that I had gotten out of the house with two babies, that they had a hard enough time doing it with their singleton. And I’m sure that’s true, that they find it a challenge to leave the house with their baby. That said, I doubt most of them started planning the outing two days ahead of time.
So yes, I make it out of the house with the babies nearly every day, pretty much unless it’s raining. And some people seem to find that impressive. But this “impressive” feat is necessary to my sanity. I had very real concerns before the babies were born about how I’d do at the stay-at-home thing. I worried about being out-of-my-mind with the combined chaos and boredom of taking care of two pre-verbal infants. And that worry is not gone. But so far, my plan to be proactive about seeking activity is paying off. Sure, the fact that they still eat roughly every three hours tends to make the day blur quickly by. But one outing a day is enough to make me feel downright busy.
So, impressive? I don’t know. Definitely not effortless, but also not that difficult with a little advanced planning. And absolutely worth it.
Tags: mom and baby classes, preparation
September 20th, 2007 at 10:49 am
It is great that you are getting out and about. It really is necessary for all involved! I too plan in advance (diaper bag is always stocked and ready to go) but it is definitely getting easier and more enjoyable to take the kids out. I have to say I am dreading winter. I do hope bad weather doesn’t crop up too much, and that the roads stay clear, etc. I simply can not fathom not leaving the house most days.
I am curious, do you nurse in public? I always had to have pumped bottles ready to go, because I was(and am) so very intimidated by the idea that one twin could lose it in public while I was nursing the other…still don’t know how to overcome this. Sorry if this is too personal of a question…I just don’t know how other moms do it!
September 21st, 2007 at 4:20 am
You ARE amazing! You sound super-organized, and how wonderful that you realize that you absolutely need to do this. I am indeed impressed with your ability to take of your needs as well as those of the babies. I wish I’d had your blog to inspire me to try to get out more on my own when the kids were infants!
Aina B.
p.s. I do understand the “just the three of us” feeling: it’s really special, at all ages! Last year, one of my dearest dreams was realized: the twins (then 5) and I took a four-hour train trip to Chicago and back, “just the three of us,” and my great memory from that trip is sitting with them in the club car, teaching them how to play “Go Fish.” For me, it can hardly get any better than that! And in 5 years, you too will have this kind of experience! It’s the best!