Both babies were down in bed, lights out, around 7:30. We didn’t necessarily intend to move bedtime back, but they were both in pretty good moods until almost 7, so we rolled with it.

Daniel, shockingly, went right to sleep! It was not to last, but it was a good start. Rebecca talked to herself and blew raspberries for at least a half hour. She then slowly ramped up until she got good and mad, which lasted maybe 45 minutes or so, and of course woke up Daniel. Daniel woke up with Rebecca’s screaming around 8:30, and though she fell asleep not long after that, he kept on going for probably about an hour. M said, “wouldn’t you just get bored of crying?” Not our kids. They’ve got dedication.

And then… nothing more than maybe a grumble or two for hours! I had been sleeping for a while, and M had just come to bed, so I took over. Daniel was up around 2:30. That’s when it got interesting.

I waited a few minutes to see if he was serious, and went in for my first check. One whiff and I knew he had a poopy diaper. Poor guy. I quietly picked him up, brought him into the other room, got a fresh diaper and PJs as it had leaked through the diaper, and then back to bed. Of course, by now he was seriously ticked off, and rapidly woke Rebecca. This one was worse than earlier, I think because they’re used to having a bottle when they wake up. So they were both mad and hungry. I kept going in every 10 minutes as per the book’s instructions. Rebecca took an hour and 45 minutes to go back to sleep. Daniel, I kid you not, went three hours. He got perilously close to my 6am mark, and I found myself wondering: if it hits 6:00 and he’s still crying, do I go get him then? Is that just teaching him that if he cries long enough I’ll eventually pick him up? Thankfully he went to sleep around 5:45 (after waking his sister a second time, thank you, but she went back to sleep quickly). When he woke up 30 minutes later, I got him up and we started the day. I actually had to go wake Rebecca up at 7:15, lest our day get completely off-kilter.

Did I like listening to my kids cry? Of course not. It’s hard, and I felt bad. By 5am when I was exhausted myself, I was tempted to scoop Daniel up and cuddle with him. I doubt it would have actually stopped him crying, but I wanted to. And yet, there was something strangely liberating about doing this. Before, when they would wake up at night, I found I would feel the need to leap out of bed and intervene as quickly as possible. Hoping it wouldn’t escalate, hoping the 2nd baby wouldn’t wake up. Quick, get the pacifier! Not working? Crap! Pick up and rock, please be quiet. No? Dammit, run downstairs and make a bottle. Oh hell, now your sister’s up.

Tonight? Of course I was immediately awake when they started crying, and I have a nasty tension headache from clenching my jaw (I think more in anticipation than anything else). But there was something strangely freeing in the knowledge that I did not have to make them stop crying. Obviously I wanted them to stop crying. But I knew that was up to them, and my job was only to make sure they were alright and quietly remind them I hadn’t really gone anywhere.

A mixed, but overall kind of rough first night. But we’re committed to seeing this thing through, and I can only imagine it will get better. Daniel went down pretty easily for naps today, and though he didn’t stay asleep super long, it’s something. Let’s hope tonight is a bit better…

Tags: Ferberize, Overnight, sleeping through the night

This entry was posted on Saturday, February 16th, 2008 at 6:22 pm and is filed under Infants, Sleep. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.