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Spoiler Alert

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (17)·   December 6th, 2011

I got a call from Rebecca’s teacher yesterday. There was a “situation” that she wanted my help with. I didn’t imagine it could be too serious, since she hadn’t said anything when I saw her at pick-up, nor was there any kind of “incident report” on a random playground injury. Still, I was surprised. Rebecca is such a goody-two-shoes in school.

At circle time, the class was talking about different holidays, and how different families celebrate different things, etc.  OK, fine, sounds good.  Well, just as they were about to dismiss and go out to play, my girl decides to announce that “Santa doesn’t really bring presents, it’s really other people.”

That’s right. My four-year-old decided to tell all of her classmates that Santa is bullshit.

So, obviously, there’s no Santa in our house, what with trying to raise Jewish kids and all. Honestly, though Santa was something I had as a kid, I find that I’m actually quite relieved NOT to be including the man in red in our holiday celebrations. No waiting in line for hours to try to convince screamy kids to sit in a stranger’s lap, no coming up with a good story for what Santa is all about, no fallout when they get older and realize it was us all along.  That said, I certainly have no beef with other families’ Santa traditions, nor do I have any desire to ruin the magic for any kid.

It’s not like my kids don’t know who Santa is. He’s freaking everywhere. They have no trouble recognizing him (much like Dora and Spongebob and other things I try to keep out of my house… you can’t avoid them). But they’ve pretty much come to see him as a character in a story, like any other. And M, well, M is a compulsive truth-teller and detail-explainer when it comes to the kids. He apparently had a talk with Rebecca the other day about exactly how and why Santa is a big, fat myth. Which, fine, I don’t mind that for my own kids in the slightest.  But anyone with preschoolers knows that they have ZERO filter, and really love to trot out their newest tidbits of knowledge.  Hence, the Santa truth bomb at circle time.

Ultimately, M and I each talked to the kids last night about it in an attempt to not completely ruin Christmas for all of their classmates. I talked to the chief truth-teller myself, and explained to Rebecca that different people believe different things. And that even though we know Santa is pretend, it would be nice to let her friends still believe otherwise if they want to.  She mostly gave me an “OK, whatevs,” and we started talking about fairies and princesses.  Daniel took in his own conversation with M, to which his immediate response was, “but WHY would their moms and dads not tell them the TRUTH?”

M is, frankly, quite proud of that one. I’m just smiling and shaking my head.

Ultimately, I think the preschool crowd has some pretty staunch Santa-believers, so I don’t think my kids’ occasional proclamations will be the death-knell for anyone’s holiday traditions this year.  I’ve explained it to the degree that I wish to, I have tried to gently suggest that we not ruin the magic for their friends, and that’s as far as I’ll go.

For the record, I think that’s all the teacher was asking – she just wanted to avoid a full-scale Christmas meltdown in a class full of 3-to-5-year-olds. I sort of wish she had handled this herself, but I’m not especially bothered by it.

What do you think? How do you handle belief or disbelief in Santa at your house?

Comments (17)
Categories : Holidays, Preschoolers, School
Tags : Christmas, Santa

Holiday Card Outtakes

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (9)·   November 29th, 2011

I have a thing about holiday cards.  I want the photos to be just so.  I think because I know I’m capable of taking pretty good pictures of my kids, I want to get REALLY GREAT ones for the holiday card.  I also have this weird insistence that they be really current. I don’t like using pictures from our summer vacation, I want them to be as close to the actual holiday as possible. I don’t know why I’m so fixated on it, but there you have it.

So fixated, in fact, that I never even made or sent cards last year. I was pregnant, I was grumpy, I was tired, and it just never happened.  I didn’t want that to be the case two years in a row.

I also harbor some guilt about the fact that I never sent a birth announcement for Ellie. Part of me thinks birth announcements are a little ridiculous in this day and age – as though ANYONE I would have sent the card to wasn’t aware of her existence within hours of her arrival.  And yet, I had meant to… and then that didn’t happen, either.

So, here we are. Holiday card time.  Photo pressure time.  I wanted to try something at least a little bit fun and creative, even though M rolled his eyes at the idea, so I bought a couple of accessories at Target and set up my sheet-on-a-bench outdoor photo studio.

I didn’t hit on quite the same magic as the last time I tried it, but I think I got some card-worthy shots.  I’ll post the card later, but for now, here’s a few that didn’t make the final cut.

Holiday Card Outtakes

Holiday Card Outtakes

Holiday Card Outtakes

Holiday Card Outtakes

Comments (9)
Categories : Holidays, Photos
Tags : NaBloPoMo

Race Report

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (15)·   November 25th, 2011

Thanksgiving morning started awfully early. I set my alarm for 5:45, but as always seems to happen when I have an early wake-up call, I was up at 4:30 and couldn’t get back to sleep. I then had the supreme pleasure of waking up everyone else in my family at about 6:15. Believe me, M is absolutely charming at that hour.

Off we drove to the Feaster Five.  We were there bright and early for the 7:45am Kids’ K, which is actually a series of kids’ races broken up by age.  The four-and-under crowd ran 100 yards on a paved track, but they even had a gated chute and a big finish line, so it felt just as “real” as the adult race, not to mention race shirts just like their parents and bibs to pin to the front.

Thanksgiving race

It was a mob scene, so I ran with Rebecca while Daniel zoomed ahead. (Yes, that was me attempting to take photos while jogging. Daniel is in the gray jacket, Rebecca is the pink hood right in front of me.)  They even had a police officer on a motorcycle start them off, and they all got finisher medals at the end.  While it was over practically before it began, they were both very excited to do it and felt like they had a great story to tell.

Thanksgiving Race

At that point, there was still a good half hour until the start of my race, and M had three kids outside in 32-degree weather. He headed back to the car to let everyone warm up and make strategic use of the van’s DVD player. I made my way to the starting area. Holy crap.

Thanksgiving Race

They capped registrations at 10,000 this year. It was an unbelievable mass of people.  But it was a beautiful morning and everyone seemed to be in a great mood. Sunny and clear, cold but not frigid. Perfect running temperature if you ask me – I’d much rather run in 30 degrees than 70. I hung out by the 10-minute-mile pace sign (which is NOT my pace, but the next one after that was walkers, dogs, and strollers), and between smartphones and sheer luck, I actually managed to find the other people I knew running the race.

Thanksgiving Race

When they blew the starting horn, my area of the pack (probably about halfway between the start and the way back of the crowd) barely moved. It took a full five minutes to get across the start, but then the congestion eased up and it wasn’t too mobbed to run.  Oh yes, people were passing me on all sides. But I just trotted along at my pokey pace, reminding myself that it didn’t matter in the slightest what anyone else was doing. The other 9,999 people could do whatever they wanted, I just needed to keep running. My goal: don’t walk. No matter how slow I go, don’t stop.

Thanksgiving Race

Of course, that was immediately put to the test. The second half-mile was a brutal hill. Thankfully, I knew it was coming – I had read about it and had actually driven it a few days earlier when we picked up our race bibs. But holy crap, it was nasty. I arguably could have walked faster than I was “running,” but on I chugged. At the top of the hill, the 5K course split off to the left while the 5-mile course continued straight ahead. Sadly, it did not, then, turn downhill. No, I’m sorry to say that pretty much the entire first half of the race continued to be a gentle uphill. Occasionally flat, but the overall trend was definitely up. As the course took a few turns, I rounded each corner and couldn’t believe it was still an ever-so-slight incline.  But dammit, I was still going.

It was right at about the 2.5-mile mark that it finally, blessedly turned downhill. I let out a very audible “oh thank God!”  My Nike+ app announced the time in my ear every half mile, and I was right around where I wanted to be. Making decent time, even.  Given my pace in previous runs, I guessed my pace would be somewhere between 12:30 and 13:00 per mile – slow as hell, but that’s how I roll.  I really wanted to keep it under 13 and finish in under 1 hour and 6 minutes, but I’d take what I could get.  Thankfully, much of the second half was downhill, and downhill is just free speed.

Around the 3.5 mile point, the course joined back up with the 5K people.  By that time, anyone left on the 5K were walking groups of families and strollers and dogs (it was a very family-friendly race and walkers were welcome), so it was a bit more congested, but not too bad.  Everything was very clearly marked, and the whole race was very nicely organized.  I was in a pretty good groove, no longer having to convince myself to keep going with every.single.step.  I knew the end was in sight.

The final half mile was more crowded – 5K walkers to my left, and long-since-finished runners to my right, walking the other direction to their cars.  But even still, I only had to dodge around a couple of people, nothing problematic. I turned the final corner, and the last tenth-or-so of a mile to the finish line is one final, nasty hill.  But damned if I was stopping now, and I knew my cheering section was waiting for me.  The Nike+ voice chimed in my ear, “five miles, completed. One hour, one minute.”  I couldn’t believe it was even possible.  I saw my family, I gave my kids a high five at the very top of the hill and turned to hit those finish mats.  I hit stop on the app and looked down to see my time.

5.08 miles. One hour, two minutes, forty seconds. Pace: 12:19.

I burst into tears.

Plenty of people would think that was a terrible time. Hell, there wasn’t even a pace group for it at the start – just 10-minute miles and then walkers.  I was something like finisher number 2500 out of 2700 in the five-mile group. WHATEVER. 12:19 is about the best pace I’ve run recently on 2- or 3-mile runs, so the fact that I managed to AVERAGE that pace for FIVE WHOLE MILES, a distance I had never, ever run before… I was so proud of myself, I thought I would burst.

Thanksgiving Race

We don’t stop and say that too often, do we? Admit that we’re proud of ourselves?  I mean, deadly sin and all that.  But this wasn’t a chest-puffing, boasting kind of pride.  This was about the fact that I am not a natural-born runner. I have short legs and am entirely too heavy. I’ve never been an athlete.  But I worked my ass off for this. For the last eight weeks, I have had a training schedule written in my calendar and have followed it as best as I possibly could. I worked for this. I fought for it. I earned it.  And not only did I accomplish it, but I did it even a little better than I thought I would.

By last night, I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to walk anymore. I limped up and down the stairs, my left knee and right foot being the biggest complainers.  But the soreness is fading, and the glow of accomplishment is still sticking around. I’m asking what’s next.

I need to sign up for another race. Not because I adore running – I still have to fight for nearly every slow step.  But I need the goal and the deadline to keep me going, because the couch is too tempting.  I’m not going to dramatically up the distance. I’m not ready for that from a fitness standpoint, nor can I commit the amount of time it would take to train.  But I want to keep going. I need to.

It doesn’t matter how slowly I go, only that I do not stop.

Comments (15)
Categories : Holidays, Just me
Tags : Feaster Five, NaBloPoMo, running, Thanksgiving

Awesomesauce

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (2)·   November 24th, 2011

A very satisfying Thanksgiving.

Early-morning running.

Thanksgiving 2011

Wildly successful fried turkey.

Thanksgiving 2011

Good times with good friends.

Thanksgiving 2011

That’s how I like my Thanksgiving.

Comments (2)
Categories : Holidays
Tags : NaBloPoMo, Thanksgiving

Thankful

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (5)·   November 23rd, 2011

It’s been a hell of a year, frankly. I won’t be sad to see it go. But as much stress as it has brought, there is no mistaking that I am fortunate beyond measure. A woefully incomplete list, I am grateful for:

M
All three of my amazing kids
A comfortable house
Good food on our table
Never having to worry about life’s necessities
Being able to splurge from time to time
World-class hospitals
Excellent health insurance
Fellow twin moms
The internet
Fabric
Sushi
Chocolate
Preschool teachers
Physical therapists
Stuffed spinach pizza
M’s job, which enables me to stay home with our kids
The child-watch room at the gym

I could go on and on. It’s an embarrassment of riches. I wish everyone could make this kind of list.

I get frustrated, I wish I could change things, I throw pity parties.  But the truth is, I am so very lucky.

Thanks to all of you for being here, and thanks for your emails and comments. I love every single one of them.

Happy Thanksgiving.

threeintheleaves-bw

Comments (5)
Categories : Holidays
Tags : NaBloPoMo, Thanksgiving

A list within a list

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (2)·   November 21st, 2011

On an average week, I feel like I’m just barely keeping up. Plenty of balls being juggled in the air, but always at least one on the ground, rolling away.  This is a week that feels even a little crazier, more frantic, more likely to fall apart.

The big kids only have school on Monday and Tuesday, because of course the preschool teachers need a staff day on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving.  Ellie has three appointments in two days. I need to keep moving in my training program so I don’t die when attempting to run five miles on Thursday morning.  And in the meantime, I have to sufficiently de-clutter my house so that there will be room for all sixteen of us to sit down for Thanksgiving dinner.  And did I mention the brining and the roasting and the baking?  Oh, and the dog needs a bath.

This week, each day requires it’s own lengthy and time-sensitive to-do list.  When to pick up my race bib and shop for groceries. When to pick up the big kids from preschool and when to take Ellie to physical therapy. When to put the turkey in the brine and prep the green beans. When to do yoga and when to run.  It can be done, but I really need to stay on top of things.

Thanksgiving groceries

Naturally, after we got home from dance class tonight, Rebecca started weeping and shivering and saying that it hurts when she swallows. Her 10-day course of antibiotics finished yesterday.  Tomorrow, we’ll be back at the pediatrician, and I suspect we will hear that the strep is back.

Of course it is.

Comments (2)
Categories : Holidays, Illness and Injury, Preschoolers
Tags : NaBloPoMo, strep throat, Thanksgiving

The Halloween Bender

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (7)·   November 1st, 2011

I thought this Halloween was going to suck. Not least of which because, in case you hadn’t heard, it freaking SNOWED two nights before Halloween.

Halloween 2011

It’s also possible that I never brought down any of the (very few to begin with) Halloween decorations from the attic, and left the pumpkins in the back of the van before suddenly remembering them on Sunday night, only to discover they were starting to go bad, so all we did was paint them.

Halloween 2011

Of course, the kids could have cared less. They had costumes, they had bags, the neighbors had candy. For bonus points, we even had a 7-year-old family friend join us for the festivities. Honestly, what more could a kid need?

Halloween 2011

M and our friends took the kids out for trick-or-treating while I manned the candy and the sleeping baby. It was chilly but not frigid, and thankfully I managed to convince Rebecca to wear her padded fleece butterfly costume instead of the flimsy princess one. The kids managed their longest stretch yet, and came home after more than an hour with a pretty impressive haul for a couple of four-year-olds.

Halloween 2011

But the fun was only just beginning. The adults wanted to dig into the take-out sushi we’d gotten for dinner, and didn’t want to have to just inhale it before we started wrangling kids again. So we left them in the living room, with their bags of candy, and put on Star Wars.

Halloween 2011

When we stopped gossiping (and eventually decided against opening the bottle of tequila) and our friends finally packed up and went home and we got the kids to head up towards bed, it was nearly 10PM. On a Monday night. Practically hallucinating from the sugar intake (in fairness, it took Rebecca nearly an hour to eat a package of Skittles), spilled cups of water on the couch, the playroom looking like a tornado had come through. It was like a frat party for preschoolers.

What’s that? We have school in the morning?

Oh hell yes, we’ve got those Parents of the Year Awards all wrapped up, baby.

Comments (7)
Categories : Holidays, Preschoolers
Tags : Halloween, NaBloPoMo

Happy Father’s Day

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (11)·   June 19th, 2011

Call me predictable, but at least M enjoys it.

My gift to him for the last four years has been the same: a three-photo frame with pictures of the kids and the letters D-A-D. (If you’d like, here’s 2008, 2009, and 2010.)  Obviously, this year, we had a new occupant of the middle frame.

Father's Day 2011

Father's Day 2011

Father's Day 2011

A very happy Father’s Day to all of the dads out there, most especially our very own M.

Comments (11)
Categories : Family, Holidays
Tags : father's day

What we need is a rodent

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (15)·   April 20th, 2011

I almost forgot about Passover this year. And, when I remembered, I thought it started a day later than it really did.  It was Monday afternoon, I shook my head and looked at M.  We agreed: it just ain’t happening this year.  Not only was I obviously not going to pull together a Seder in the space of three hours, but I was simply not going to do the grain-avoidance thing. There’s just too much else going on right now. Sorry, Passover. Next year.

That said, we’ve made the acquaintance of a lovely rabbi through the Chaplain’s office at the Big Hospital. She has come by a few times, we’ve talked to her about maybe doing a Hebrew naming ceremony for Eleanor. She leaves us a mini loaf of challah on Fridays.  And on Monday, she left a big bag, courtesy of the “Big Hospital Seder Committee.” No kidding, you can even call down to the cafeteria and order Kosher-for-Passover meals for the whole family.  The gift bag had a box of matzo, some sparkling grape juice, a few Passover-friendly treats.  And a couple of small gifts for the kids.

OK. So, I know the Jewish holidays don’t typically have the same flair as most of the major Christian ones. The Hannukah vs. Christmas thing always falls flat. The most fun holiday of the year is one hardly any non-Jews know about (Purim – there’s costumes involved, and often somewhat drunken revelry).  But seriously, could we get a PR firm in on this somehow?

Because my kids got Passover stickers.

Passover stickers

That’s right! Not only do you get matzo, but a sticker for each of the 10 plagues!

Passover stickers

I think my favorites are the “RIP Egyptian Firstborn” headstone, and the sickly cow. Though the locusts are a nice touch, too.

Seriously, Easter. Where did you get this whole friendly-fuzzy-rodent-who-brings-eggs-and-candy thing, and how can we get a piece of that action?

Comments (15)
Categories : Holidays, Hospital
Tags : Passover

I shall now become a hermit

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (7)·   December 27th, 2010

This may have been among the most exhausting six weeks of my entire life.  And I’ve had newborn twins.

There was the Hawaii trip, which was lovely and all, but the travel and re-entry was brutal.  A few days after we got back, and well before we had gotten over the jet-lag, it was Thanksgiving (at my house, though blessedly small).  Barely a week after that, my in-laws came to town for 10 days.  And while they didn’t stay with us, and are very nice people, it’s still an additional stressor to have visitors.

After they left, I had precisely one week to get my act together (barely) to fly to Chicago for our annual Christmas trip, where we stayed at both of my parents’ houses over the course of a single week.

Christmas is exhausting.  It was always tiring, just with the back-and-forth balancing act that is life with divorced parents.  Add in the whole “I converted to Judaism and am trying to raise Jewish kids” thing, and a husband who is generally not psyched about it all, and it’s nothing short of an emotional minefield.  The cherry on top, of course, is that I am now firmly in my 3rd trimester, exhausted, but cannot sleep well on the best of nights, much less on an unfamiliar bed.

The kids did spectacularly well throughout this travel marathon.  They enjoyed their first snow of the season (it started snowing in Boston a few hours after we left, and we did get back to town in time for snOMG, Snowmageddon, or whatever the hell we’re calling this).  They made one snow angel after another with my mom, and thoroughly enjoyed the pile my dad made in the backyard for sledding.

December in Chicago

December in Chicago

We had incredibly late bedtimes, hit-or-miss naps, party after party, and crowds of relatives they only see once or twice a year.  And yet, miraculously, tantrums and meltdowns were near zero.  Daniel came out of the defiant funk he’d been in while my in-laws were in town (delightful!) to become nothing short of Mr. Congeniality.  Rebecca swung a bit more in the other direction with a little whininess and extra demanding behavior, but nothing too severe.

December in Chicago

December in Chicago

Me? By 7:30pm on Christmas, as we made our SIXTH stop of the day with no naps for anyone, I was so tired I almost burst into tears.  The balancing, the logistics, the constant interaction, the heaviness of the belly, the full week of disrupted sleep.  I was D-U-N done.

Our flight home the next day was at 7:00 in the morning.  We woke up to an extra 4-6 inches of snow, which made our drive to the airport a rather slow adventure.  I crossed my fingers and toes that we would make it back to Boston before the Snowpocalypse shut the airport, and despite a mechanical delay, we were blessedly successful.

I sent M to the grocery store while I threw on a movie for the kids and a load of laundry in the wash.  I have not left the house, save for 10 minutes in the snow this afternoon, since we gt home from the airport.  For the next two months, I have no intention of going more than about a 3-mile radius from my house.  Preschool pickup and dropoff. Doctor’s appointments.  Maybe Target if I’m feeling saucy.  I’m only going to the gym for the kids’ activities, as I have cut my own exercise down to Prenatal Yoga and nothing more.  I don’t want visitors. I just want to sit quietly in my house, have a daily routine, get some sewing done, maybe take a nap.

When we were in Chicago, my grandmother innocently asked me what my next trip was, and if I was coming to Florida.  I wasn’t sure whether to laugh or cry.  Not an ice cube’s chance in hell.

I’m 29 weeks pregnant. Stick a fork in me.

Comments (7)
Categories : Family, Holidays, Pregnancy, Preschoolers, Travel
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