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Vacation FAIL

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (12)·   February 18th, 2009

Well, this one was really a doozy.  As I mentioned before I left, I was feeling mixed about this trip before it even started.  Warm weather sounds great, but I was not looking forward to the travel or being in someone else’s space.

[Forgive the outrageous number of photo mosaics to follow... I had an awful lot of pictures to share! If you want to see full size versions, click on the mosaic and it will take you to Flickr, where it will link to the individual photos.]

We were there less than 24 hours before Daniel was clearly sick.  Poor kiddo, not a fun way to spend vacation.  But he’s a really sweet kid even when sick, and he was clearly trying to power through and put on a good face. We went to the park, we went to the zoo.

At the Park

My mother-in-law, who has completely forgotten that she spent her entire child and adult life in New Jersey and Connecticut, is now one of those crazy Florida people who keep the thermostat set at 80 and apologize that the kids won’t be able to play outside because it’s so cool.  It was 73.  I insisted that they change out of the sweatpants and long-sleeved shirt that she had chosen, into shorts like normal human beings. (Especially ones who had just left New England, with it’s weather in the teens and over a foot of snow on the ground.)

The zoo

Unfortunately, on Monday, Daniel was not sounding any better.  The cough and wheezing was sticking around. Finally, after he clearly wasn’t sleeping (very unlike him), M took him back to the doctor.  Diagnosis: one rather nasty ear infection.  Tuesday was rough.  Bad sleep, and my poor happy guy had run out of happy juice. Cranky, tired, running a fever.  And just to make it feel a little crazier, Tuesday was the day M was scheduled to fly home, and I would move over to my mom’s house.  I felt like I was dragging the Typhoid Twins all over South Florida!  “So good to see you! Have some geeeerrrrmmms!”

My creation

The next few days, Daniel slowly improved while Rebecca went downhill. It was unpleasant, to say the least. The kids weren’t sleeping at all well, between the congestion, fevers, and new places.  I wasn’t sleeping well, because they were awake a lot, and because my back had gone to a very bad place after several nights on an air mattress at my in-laws’.  They woke up too early and were cranky all morning.  The afternoon nap was too short and they’d wake up already in a temper tantrum.  I was exhausted.  It felt like reliving the newborn days, except with the loud insanity of toddlers.  On Thursday, Rebecca threw such a spectacular tantrum that I took her to the doctor to see if she had developed an ear infection.  In fact, no.  Just a tantrum. But the woman I saw asked me to please bring her back in before our flight on Saturday, just so she could make sure her ears were clear to fly. Ha.

Florida

There were some bright spots in between all the crying.  Daniel especially had fun in the pool, Rebecca was much more wary.  We went to a great nature center called Gumbo Limbo and met a turtle named Polly who is the same age as the kids.  Rebecca even saw a starfish, pointed, and said “star!”  The weather, blessedly, was perfection.  High 70s to low 80s and sunny, every day.  If it had been 50 and raining, I swear I would have rented a car and started driving north on I-95 until I hit Massachusetts.

Gumbo Limbo

Saturday morning, I was clearly in denial.  Rebecca barely slept and woke up extra cranky with a high fever, but I was oh-so-sure her ears would be fine when we went to get them checked.  Yeah, not so much. When they said her ear was bad, I burst into tears.  I cried in the office. I cried in the car on the way to the pharmacy. I cried when I called M to tell him we weren’t coming home.  I cried when the goddamn streets were blocked because of a parade and I had to drive 30 minutes out of my way just to get back to my mom’s place.

Highly medicated

I was completely fried.  I know I have a tendency to put on a brave face and maybe not complain too much.  But this trip had completely kicked my ass.  The kids hadn’t woken up happy in a week. There was so much screaming and so little sleeping.  It felt like a nightmare.  And I felt like the trip had been wasted. I was coming down so the grandparents could get their fix, but felt like everyone got short-changed on time and energy.  There was all of this great weather and fun activities, and the kids were having none of it.  I just wanted it to be over.  And did I mention that JetBlue does not do medical fee waivers, so changing our tickets cost me upwards of $600?  Nothing could go right.

Not feeling so hot

Thankfully, by Sunday, Rebecca’s antibiotics had kicked in and she was much happier, and Daniel was completely back to his old self.  They actually woke up from a nap without screaming.  Thank god.  We went for walks, we went back to the pool. I did what I could to redeem the trip, and started to feel a little bit less homicidal.

Redeeming vacation

Monday was unfortunately somewhat cranky again, and the least pleasant weather day of the whole trip, but Rebecca’s ears checked out well enough and we got the green light to come home on Tuesday.  The best we could do with flights was one at 6:30 in the morning, so my mom and I plucked the kids from bed at 4:30AM.  Thankfully, they did really well on the flight.  My mom had to scrap her plans to stay in MA for a few days, and didn’t even leave the airport in Boston.  She got the next flight back to Fort Lauderdale and was home by mid-afternoon.

Anyways, there you have it. The saga that was our extended trip to south Florida.  I’m certainly in no rush to do it again…

Comments (12)
Categories : Illness and Injury, Toddlers, Travel
Tags : Florida

Happy Thursday – Warmer Weather Ahead

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (6)·   February 5th, 2009

Happy ThursdayIt’s Happy Thursday, everyone! There really is something to celebrating the day-before-the-day-before the weekend, isn’t there?  Makes it feel like the week is really moving.

Anyways, what are you thinking about this Happy Thursday?  Something great going on?  Looking forward to something fun?  Or are you just glad this godforsaken week is nearly over?  Grab the Walter button, add your link to Mr. Linky, and link back here!

For me, I’m feeling a bit mixed, because we’re leaving for Florida tomorrow night?

I know, woe is me, right?  Who in their right mind would complain about leaving New England for Florida, especially in February?  And in some ways, I’m really looking forward to it.  My in-laws last night apologized because it’s been kind of “chilly” down there.  Yeah, like 65.  Please.  It’s NINE fricking degrees this morning, with a below-zero windchill.  There’s a foot of crusty old snow out in my yard and where the sidewalks should be.  I’m assuming they’re still there, but I haven’t seen them in at least a month.  It’s treacherous and slippery, and every time we get a few more inches, it’s harder to shovel because of all the crap underneath.  I can’t let the kids play outside, because there’s no way they could walk.  Hell, I can hardly let them walk to the car by themselves.  Too much ice.  So, yay for temperatures well above freezing!  We get to play outside without jackets!  There will be moisture in the air, so maybe their dry little cheeks won’t be so chapped!  Green grass!  The pool!  The beach!  Hooray!

Hate being bundled up

On the other hand… I’m still burned out from our long trip to Chicago in December. I’m not looking forward to the plane. I’m not looking forward to trying to find some arrangement for the kids to sleep.  I don’t want to be out of my own space for a week, sleeping on an uncomfortable guest bed.  Half the week will be staying at my in-laws’ place, half with my mom.  We all know that can have its good and bad parts.

On balance, of course, I’m sure it will be lots of fun.  And just plain nice to be away from jackets and hats and boots for a week.  But travel is always stressful, and I have a lot of packing and details to figure out.  So, that’s why I’m feeling a little ambivalent this Happy Thursday.  I guess I’m just looking forward to waking up in the warmth on Saturday morning!

And, if nothing else… it sure will be different than our trip last year, when the kids were only five months old.

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Comments (6)
Categories : Family, Toddlers, Travel
Tags : Florida, Happy Thursday, in-laws

Home again, home again

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (9)·   April 13th, 2008

We survived our whirlwind trip to Florida (a place that is pretty near the top of the “states I’ll never live in” list). Literally, it was just over 49 hours between landing and taking off again. Insanity. How many visits did we cram into those two short days? Let’s see… M’s mom, M’s dad, M’s grandmother, M’s mom’s brother and sister-in-law, M’s dad’s sister and brother-in-law, my mom, my stepdad, my stepdad’s sister, M’s grandmother’s former neighbor… and all of the old ladies at the condo complex. (Who asked me, among other things, if I “gained a lot of weight” when I was pregnant, and of the twins, “which is the better one?” Um, excuse me?)

The kiddos did really quite well. Good on the plane on the way down. So-so on the napping. Daniel was somewhat fussier than usual for much of the weekend, given all of the stimulation and the lack of good napping, but in general they both were great. Rebecca was just a funny little monkey, putting on a show for everyone all weekend long. Daniel even slept nearly the entire flight on the way home! Wahoo!

IMG_0271 I’m really tired, and I can hear on the monitor that Rebecca isn’t sleeping that well after her crazy weekend. But I guess I have to say it was worth it, because it sure did make M’s parents, and grandmother in particular, awfully happy to see them.

And now, of course, there’s talk of all variety of upcoming visits to our place. My mom is hoping to come soon, M’s mom needs to come up not only to visit, but to pick up a friend’s cat that is being given to M’s grandmother for company. My dad will be in town this weekend, as will my grandmother. Just watch, the next thing I’m going to complain about is that I just have too many visitors!! :-) I’ll try to restrain myself.

Comments (9)
Categories : Family, Infants, Travel
Tags : Florida

Off we go, again

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (7)·   April 10th, 2008

We leave for Florida tomorrow, for an early Passover visit with M’s family. Weather should be nice, family is super excited to see the babies. But I cannot lie. We haven’t even left yet, and already I’m exhausted.

All of this travel is killing me. This is our fourth round-trip with the kids. We’ve gone somewhere nearly every month since Christmas. It’s draining, physically, emotionally, and financially. Yes, we’re fortunate, we can technically afford the plane tickets. But that doesn’t mean I’m exactly happy to spend all of that money.

This is sort of one of those times I really wish I only had one kid. Not that I’d give up either of mine, obviously, but I can dream of how my life would be comparatively much easier with only one. I’d be more willing to travel with one kid as a lap infant, and not have to pay for an extra seat. I’d be more willing to travel by myself, which is a pretty unrealistic option with two. If I could travel by myself, I wouldn’t have to be tied to M’s vacation time, and we wouldn’t be spending a paltry 48 hours in Florida this weekend.

This is also when I feel more and more like I wish I lived in Chicago. I wrote about this on How Do You Do It? earlier this week, and it’s still very much on my mind. When we have these small windows of time with one branch or another of the family, there is a lot of pressure to “make the most of it.” Cram in as many events, “firsts,” people, and places as possible. We really have three sets of grandparents: M’s parents, my mom (& stepdad), and my dad (& stepmom). Attempting to see all three with any degree of frequency, and attempting to devote “equal time” to all, and suddenly we’re constantly on a plane. And none of these three tend to particularly overlap socially, even when they occasionally overlap geographically. So everyone is sort of protective of “their” time.

Except that, for instance, my mom will be in Florida while we’re there this weekend. About an hour away from my in-laws. Not surprisingly, she very much wants to come see the babies. With my stepdad. And my grandmother. And my aunt & uncle. I’m torn, and feeling a lot of competing pressures. On the one hand, I obviously want my mom (and everyone else) to be able to see the kids. Mom, stepdad, and grandmother haven’t seen them since our last trip to Florida, and aunt & uncle haven’t even met them yet. On the other hand, we’ve only got a very short period of time with M’s family, including his grandmother, who is getting pretty old and is not in the greatest health. Do I tell my family that, no, they can’t come see the kids? How could I do that? But do I intrude on M’s family’s time with the kids? I don’t want to do that, either.

And so, you can see why I was very nearly in tears just thinking about it this afternoon.

This is also why I wish I lived in Chicago, near the vast majority of my family. Then, I wouldn’t have to cram everything into these tiny windows of time. We could have people over for dinner one night, go spend a day at grandma’s some other time, etc. We could take a trip to Florida to see M’s family, and not have to split it with other people, or use his one remaining vacation day to do it (he’d have plenty if we didn’t have all of that other family we had to travel to see!). We wouldn’t have to (as my mom did at Christmas) host an open house so that the most people could view the babies in the shortest period of time. Three cheers for efficiency?

My sister-in-law is probably right. I probably should work on setting limits and absolving myself of much of the responsibility of ensuring that everyone gets their “fair share” of the kids. That sounds like the right thing to do. Except that, after 20 years of doing the divorced-parent time-share dance, and then the last 7 years of adding another family to the mix… I just don’t see that happening any time soon. I can say that everyone should come here more often, and that’s true. And I think that will happen… except it can’t really happen with M’s family, what with his grandmother’s health and all.

But alas, no more time for the pity party this evening. There’s laundry to be done and bags to be packed, and an early-morning flight to catch. It’s questionable as to whether I’ll have much by way of time on the computer this weekend (remember, lots to cram into a short period of time!!!), so I’ll catch you all on the flipside. Have a great weekend, everyone!

Comments (7)
Categories : Family, Infants, Travel
Tags : divorced parents, Florida, in-laws

Florida Photos

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (4)·   February 3rd, 2008

No explanation needed, here are some of my favorite pictures from our trip to Florida.
(Yes, thank you, we made it home just fine, the trip was blessedly uneventful.)

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DSC_0087

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DSC_0133

Comments (4)
Categories : Family, Infants, Photos, Travel
Tags : Florida

Coming Home

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (4)·   February 2nd, 2008

Well hello there! Long time no… see? Anyways, I’m here on my last morning in Florida, packed and very much ready to return home. I’ll miss the warmth, but I can’t wait to be back in my own space. Not to mention back with M, who went home on Monday while I stayed for the week. We all miss Daddy.

Anyways, a few notes from our trip for your reading enjoyment.

Sleep: Awful to almost awesome
Our first day here, I really wasn’t sure I’d make it. We had an early morning flight, which I thought would be good. And it probably was as good as anything, but it kicked off a day in which neither child seemed to nap AT ALL. By the end of the day, Rebecca was more hysterical than I’ve ever seen her, even in the tub, which usually works magic. They were restless all night long, and Daniel ended up in the swing for the majority of the night. The only thought that kept running through my head was: “this was a bad idea.”
It stayed mediocre at best for several more nights at my in-laws’. It was a new space, different cribs, a very echo-y room… not good times for anyone. Then M went home on Monday and I headed to my mom’s place a little further south. A little more fresh air and a clock radio set to static seemed to help. Rebecca had a hard time getting all the way to sleep, but there was slight improvement. I went to the bookstore and picked up Dr. Ferber. The time is rapidly approaching, but that’s another post.
Then they both went back down to one feeding, two nights in a row. And on Thursday night… Daniel slept from 6:30pm until 5:30am. Not so much as a pacifier replacement. Yes, that was a heavenly chorus that you just heard. Rebecca is still somewhat restless (I think needs to ditch the pacifier), but they are oh-so-ready. Awesome.

If you can’t take the heat…
Holy crap. My in-laws are delightful people. But living in Florida and getting older has totally thinned their blood. M’s grandmother graciously let us use her condo for ourselves and the babies. It was like a damn sauna. Hot, stuffy, muggy. It was nearly 80 degrees in there (only 72 outside!). And she kept offering us her electric blanket. I’m not kidding. We finally made the command decision to turn on the a/c the first night (maybe to 74?), and for the rest of the weekend she was freezing anytime she walked into her own place. In the meantime, I’m sweating bullets. And M’s parents’ place was no cooler. Yowza. I was glad to get to my mom’s place at the beach, just for the breeze.

Mr. Gross Motor
Daniel has had several big leaps in gross motor skills while we’ve been down here. Monday afternoon, after being painfully close for several days, he rolled right over from his back to his belly. So proud of himself! Also, while on his tummy, he’s started pushing up with his arms (used to rely mostly on neck and back strength to lift up), and even reaching out to manipulate toys! I sense forward motion is not far away. He has also finally started grabbing his own feet. Again, he’s been close for a while. But now he figured it out, and he just can’t stop. Too much fun.
And, in late-breaking news, Rebecca decided not to let him have all the fun. After being in the same “I could roll over at any moment” position since THANKSGIVING, she unceremoniously rolled from her back to belly just this morning.

Nice trade
Monday or Tuesday, Daniel was kind enough to give Rebecca his cough, which she’d avoided for over a week. And after finishing her antibiotics on Wednesday, she returned the favor and Daniel woke up with two goopy, crusty eyes on Thursday morning. How nice. Good thing the pediatrician made sure to prescribe me extra medicine.

The Pool!
Every day at my mom’s place, we took the kids in the pool. Too much fun! I’ll post pictures of them in adorable swimsuits and hats (and other pics) when I get home. Rebecca, like many things, was uncertain at first. Eventually she decided it was, at best, acceptable. Daniel, on the other hand, was splashing around within five minutes. He loved going back and forth across the pool with my mom, chasing after a ball. It was really great just to get all of that fresh air.

Help, I need somebody
I must admit, any complicated family relationships aside, it was delightful to have all of the extra hands. Especially once M had to go home (so sad!). M’s parents were great, had a wonderful time with the kids, and we even got to go out to lunch on our own. And then, while at the beach, my mom and stepdad came over every morning around 7 or 7:30 and took the kids and the strollers. They went visiting great-grandmothers, went for walks along the beach, and had a delightful time. And I got to NAP! Wahoo!
And now, back at M’s parents’ place, my mother-in-law is being kind enough to fly back to Boston with me. Certainly, she also gets some extra baby time out of the deal, but she’s flying back after only one night. A wonderful thing for her to do, just so I don’t have to fly with two babies on my own.

Anywho, that’s most of the updates from down south. In the end, a good trip (as all you parents know, once there are kids in the picture, it’s not a vacation anymore, it’s a trip). Grandparents and great-grandparents got to visit with the babies, who were of course a huge hit. We all got a break from the cold and snow, into the fresh air and sun. It wasn’t easy, but eventually things settled down. Hopefully today’s plane ride will be uneventful and the kids will have an easier time re-adjusting to being home.

Coming up…
-Introducing Dr. Ferber
-Six month birthday and pediatrician visit
-Pictures, pictures, and more pictures!

Comments (4)
Categories : Child Development, Family, Illness and Injury, Infants, Sleep, Travel
Tags : Florida, Gross motor, in-laws, Mom, Overnight

Panic!

By Goddess in Progress · Comments (3)·   January 17th, 2008

It snuck up on me. It shouldn’t have, as I was the one who made the plans in the first place, but suddenly it approaches. We’re leaving for Florida at the end of next week.

Oh, I know, poor me leaving cold and snowy New England for the sun and beach. Believe me, I’m looking forward to wearing fewer layers. But I’m suddenly freaking out for two reasons. The first is obviously traveling with the babies (no, we aren’t flying at bedtime, thank you). Nervous about the flights, frantically making lists of things to bring and things to buy. We’re going down to see M’s family, who lives there. But I’m actually staying longer so that I can hang out with my mom at her condo in the same general area. The good part about this is that we can potentially buy things and leave them down there, if not for our own future use, at least for someone’s. The bad part is, well, buying stuff. I don’t want to spend a ton of money on things that will only be used for a week. Anyways, I’m poking around Amazon.com and Craigslist, and even sent emails to some MOT clubs in Florida. We’ll see.

The other major reason I’m freaking out is the sudden realization that I have to pack for myself. Um, can you say, oh crap? If I already thought I had very few clothes that fit, and I’ve vowed not to wear maternity clothes out of the house anymore, you can just imagine what the warm-weather clothing situation must be like. Let’s just say, it’s not good. So now I’m on Old Navy, Lane Bryant, and Lands’ End, searching for shorts and t-shirts. And… oh my god… a swimsuit. I’m starting to feel faint. I mean, I’m looking forward to taking my kids for a dip in the pool, but does that really mean I have to don swimwear in a semi-public place? Oh dear. Maybe I’ll be the designated photographer. I can already hear my mom’s less-than-subtle questions about Weight Watchers. (No, I haven’t started yet. Yes, I’m going to.) Good times…

I do think it will be a nice visit, and I’m looking forward to temperatures in the 70s, to be sure. But for the moment… good lord, I have a lot of lists to make.

Comments (3)
Categories : Family, Travel
Tags : clothing, Florida, in-laws, packing
   

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